Christmas is fast approaching, we seem to ratchet up the stress at this time of year more so than at any other time. So what are you going to do this year to practice a little self-care before the big day?

I’ve listed some of the things I do below that really helps my self-care and stress reduction at this time.

Start Off By Making A List.

Santa isn’t the only one who should make a list for a number of reasons.

1. It helps you stay on budget.

By making a list of food, presents etc., you know what’s needed & how much you’ll need to spend. Stick to the list & the budget, you don’t need to go into debt for Christmas.

If money is tight & you have a big family suggest that presents are only bought for children & you all get together to have kris kindle for each child in the family. So that you only have to buy for your own children – Santa – & one other child in the family.

Please remember how badly you felt last year trying to pay off that debt after Christmas, just don’t go there this year. You owe it to yourself to do this & if you are honest with no one else at least be honest with yourself.

2. You get stuff done quickly.

If you know what you want you can head straight to a store & pick it up or order online. That’s what I did. I had a list of who I wanted presents for, I headed out, bought what I needed & that’s it I’m finished in one afternoon.

This also helps if you don’t like to be in shops when the crowds hit, you can be in & out as soon as the shops’ open & before others arrive.

What else can you do to help with self-care and reduce your stress at the same time?

Take some time for yourself in the run up to the big day.

Christmas is hectic, especially if you are the one hosting. So between now & Christmas Eve, I want you to spend some time just for yourself & relax. If you are finding it hard to relax then please join my free mums group Less Stressed More Success For Mums.

Here are some a few tips that you can use to help you do just that.

1. Have a relaxing bath at least once a week, light the candles, put in your favourite bath product. Just sink into the bath & relax. If you are a stay at home parent you can always do this after the kids are dropped off to school.
2. Take all your breaks at work, yes lunchtime, elevenses, 3 pm etc., you need it. Life will go on & if you are so busy that you never take your lunch then I suggest you start doing it.
3. Get outside for at least 15 minutes you need vitamin D & it also helps lift your mood.
4. Meditate, try some mindfulness, go on give it a go just 10 minutes a day. It will change your perspective on life and reduce your stress levels.
5. Take time for your hobbies, have coffee with a positive friend & attend group meetings if you need to.
6. If you’re in a relationship have a date night at least once this week or over Christmas. You don’t have to go out, cook a meal together, set the table & light the candles. Relax in front of the TV or just play a silly board game. If you have children remember you are showing them how two people love each other in a healthy manner.
7. Try to get to bed on time or a little early, stop all social media on your phone at night & remove all distractions from the room.
8. Try a Journal. Getting your emotions & thoughts out of your head is important. It is a great way to relax & help your mind switch off at night. It doesn’t have to be anything special, a simple notebook will do. So starting right now jot down your thoughts, no matter how silly or angry, just get them out & see what happens.
9. Don’t forget to add 3 things your grateful for that day to the end of the page. It will, I promise, change your mind.

Self-Care On Christmas Day

Christmas day can be hard for many of us. So do spare a thought for others less fortunate than yourself. In saying that Christmas can be a time of loneliness & difficulties, so if you know someone who is spending time alone this Christmas spare them some time.

Time is a wonderful and precious gift, it costs us nothing but our willingness to give. Check on neighbours to see if they are alright, call someone you know is alone.

Spend even 10 minutes on the phone with someone is a more precious gift than any present you could give them. If possible invite them to spend time with your family this year.

Don’t forget to set healthy boundaries.

I know when families get together it can be sometimes fraught with difficulties but this is the time of forgiveness & letting go. I know that is easier said than done.

Forgiveness is a one-way street, you forgive the person but you don’t necessarily reconcile with them. That would mean they would have to seek your forgiveness & change their ways. Forgiveness is about you & your mental health, it isn’t about the other person.

When you’re with your family it can cause so many issues to arise from your childhood, past hurts, sibling rivalry etc. So what do you?

Well the good old adage of counting to 10 helps. Mindfulness or a 3 minute breather helps here also. It trains your mind to take that step back & think before you speak. Slip off to the loo & inhale for a count of 7, exhale for a count of 11, for 3 minutes at least (this is another form of meditation). Do this till you calm down.

Don’t drink too much it only adds fuel to the fire. When people are drunk they tend to say or do things they later regret. Don’t be one of them.

Don’t take the bait either. I know it’s hard, but if you stop dancing with the other guy he has no partner to dance with. It’s okay to get up and walk away or leave if you need to. You can also set a time limit on how long you will spend with certain people. 

Try to enjoy yourself, focus on the children, join in with their games, avoid the family members who set you off. Remember it’s only 1 day!

But remember you also have a choice not to spend any time with anyone you don’t have to. It’s okay to turn down invitations from family and friends. You can create your own traditions as a family instead.

Work With Me.

Remember you are allowed to ask for support. No one is an island. If you need extra support then you can also work with me. We all struggle with stress and overwhelm from time to time. If you find this has become a problem for you and you’d like some support then schedule an appointment with me.

Getting further help.

If you or a loved one needs help over Christmas you can call the Samaritans on 116 123 &/or Caredoc Carlow, Kilkenny, Wexford, Waterford, South Tipperary and South Wicklow call: 1850 334 999. Or you local emergency service.