People who succeed at their habits and goals have daily routines which they follow with laser like focus. This aids them in building the life they want. You can create such a system with a little planning. If you follow your new routines you’ll find it’s an excellent way to live your life to its fullest while also fitting in some new self-care habits.

Having a routine, and sticking to it, is an  incredible  way to develop new habits. But we need to remember it will take time to develop these new routines. So don’t be too hard on yourself.

It is important to note that we will hit the usually obstacles associated with any change. But when we remind ourselves of the benefits, and our why, we find that is all the motivation we need to continue with these small changes.

The Benefits Of Having A Morning And Evening Routine

1. Ensures we get self-care habits scheduled and other important tasks.
2. Reviewing your to do list will also help us to see exactly what we do and for whom, where we need to hand back responsibility or hand over responsibility to an older child/teen, and ask for help
3. Reduces decision fatigue: We can schedule in tasks when we feel fresher. Plus we reduce decisions by making positive behaviours part of our daily routine. This reduces our need to think about what to do and when. For example you simply exercise because that is now part of your morning routine.
4. Reduces guilt from not fitting some essential things into your daily and weekly routines, you now have a time slot for them, e.g. calling family or friends, meditating, journaling, etc.
5. Keeps you grounded as you are sticking to a regular routine and this give us a sense of control over our lives.
6. Feel more productive, as you have regular slots for routine items on your to do list as well as time for other items during the day.

How To Develop Morning And Evening Routines

A little planning is needed first.

1 Make a list of your daily tasks. At this stage don’t worry about when you do them just write everything down.

It’s best to do this over a two week period and to carry a small note book in which you can jot down things as they arise. By write everything on the list, I mean everything! Housework, gym, walking, grocery shopping, paying bills, meeting up with family and friends, dropping kids off and pick up’s for school and their activities, volunteer activities, hobbies, anything you do for others outside of work, showers, teeth brushing, all basic self-care, meditation, journaling, etc. Nothing is too small.

2 Next ask yourself some questions. At the end of the fortnight ask yourself some basic questions:

1. Am I a lark or an owl, are you at your freshest in the morning or evening? Even if you are an owl you might find that you are too exhausted in the evening to do much once the kids are in bed. Give yourself a break we will review your to do list.
2. Am I a stay at home parent or working parent? This will influence how much time you have in the mornings and evenings. Do you already leave some chores until the weekend?
3. Are you a single parent or a couple? Not everything on your to do list is yours alone, especially if you have a partner who can help out.
4. How old are your children? Older children and teens can help out at home.
5. What tasks on the list are daily, weekly, monthly? Make a note beside each one.

3 Time to review the To Do List.

1. Is everything on that list yours? If it belongs to someone else hand it back, you have enough to do.
2. Do you have to do absolutely everything on this list? Does it still fit into your lifestyle (does it still serve you)? Are you doing something to please someone else (please let these go, they are energy drainers)?
3. Can you ask for help with anything on the list? If you are in a relationship partners are capable of doing their fair share and older children/teens can do chores. Let them help, yes they may kick up a fuss at the start but you are doing them no favours for later life if you don’t teach them to look after themselves and their environments. Be at least honest with yourself if you are having trouble asking for help here.
4. Now what is left should be a more realistic to do list.

Developing a morning and evening routine.

Some more questions I’m afraid, but this is all for planning purposes. A little planning and preparation will help you succeed.

Mornings:

1. What time do you usually get up? Start time for morning routine.
2. What happens after that normally? Kids off to school and /or you off to work? Finish time for morning routine.
3. What would you like to happen here? It’s okay to dream this out at this stage.
4. Now what is the reality of the situation in the mornings? We are trying to find out what we can add or delete to make this routine a better one for you and closer to your ideal. Is there anything that you could leave till the evening, preparation the night before can make for an easier morning routine especially if you have children.

Evenings:

1. What time do you go to bed? Finish time for your evening routine.
2. What happens when you get in from work (or before making dinner)? This will give you a start time for your evening routine.
3. What would you like to happen here? Yes dream time again.
4. What is the reality of your evenings prior to bed? Again what can you add, delete or ask for help with here? Can you add anything in here to help with an easier morning routine such as making lunches, laying out clothes, packing kid’s bags and storing them by the door with coats etc., ready for an easier get away in the morning? Can you leave any housework for the weekends?

Some things you can’t get rid of: showers, teeth brushing, meditation, exercise, journaling.

Some things you can definitely ask for help with to free up some time: meals (including preparation), kid’s homework, and kid’s bedtime routine, dishes, hovering, laundry and other household chores.

Are you finding it hard to fit your exercise in, either in the morning or evening, what about at doing it at lunchtime?  A quick 20 minute walk will keep your exercise habit on track each day, get you outside and set you up for a more positive afternoon. You can also journal and meditate at this time too, although I do still recommend a brain dump just bed.

Find a way of enjoying the first hours of your day and get up when the alarm goes off first. If you really struggle with this set an additional alarm for 10 minutes later so you can meditate before getting out of bed. You’ll still have a slower start to your day the way you like but with a positive twist.

Evenings are the best time for us to plan and prepare for the next day as our energy is lower, so reviewing your day, tomorrow’s schedule and laying out clothes for tomorrow is a good idea. If you are consistently low on energy and fatigued, get a check up from your GP but also consider taking vitamins.

Other things you could add in during the evening:

• Have a chat with your family or friends
• Meditate on how you spent the day
• Read a book in bed

Remain flexible. Remember above all be realistic with your routines and have patience you probably will need to adjust it.

Write up your morning and evening routine from your new To Do List next. 

These are only an example to give you an idea of the layout of a routine. But only you will know what suits your lifestyle best. You have your new to do list now so  write up your own morning and evening routines. You might need to adjust these over the next few weeks until you get a routine that suits you best. But don’t give up, take it slowly and if you need to just add one thing at a time.

Morning Routine. (No kids)

• Start Time: 6:30 AM: Arise, brush teeth.
  Put on gym clothes and head out for a walk or do a workout.
• 7.00 AM: Return home and shower, dress, etc.
• 7.30 AM: 20 minutes of meditation, journal.
• 7:50 AM: Breakfast and Review day’s schedule.
• Finish Time: 8.30 AM Leave for work.

Evening Routine

• Start Time: 6.30 PM Return home makes dinner.
• 7.30 PM Dishes, other household chores.
• 8.00 PM TV/ Hobbies etc.
• 9:30 PM: Review day and plan tomorrow’s schedule, Leave out clothes for the morning.
• 10:00 PM: Get ready for bed.
• 10:15 PM: Write in journal/brain dump.
• 10:30 PM: Read a book.
• Finish Time: 11:00 PM: Lights out.

For someone with children the morning and evening routines will look a lot different and may not include time for a walk/workout in the morning.

Morning Routine

• Start Time: 6:30 AM: Arise, brush teeth, shower and get dressed.
• 7.00 AM: Get children up for school, make breakfast/lunches, put on laundry and unload dishwasher.
• Finish Time: 8.00 AM Leave for school/work.

Lunchtime: Walk 20 minutes, meditate, and eat lunch.

Evening Routine

• Start Time: 6.30 PM Return home makes dinner.
• 7.30 PM Dishes, other household chores, make lunches for tomorrow.
• 8.00 PM Get children to bed (depending on age) or start bed-time routine.
• 9:30 PM: Review day and plan tomorrow’s schedule, Leave out clothes for the morning.
• 10:00 PM: Get ready for bed.
• 10:15 PM: Write in journal/brain dump.
• 10:30 PM: Read a book.
• Finish Time: 11:00 PM: Lights out.

Your weekend routine might include a day for meal preparation and larger household chores. You could include a routine for that also, one where others help out (If you have a partner and/or children) so you can enjoy your weekends together. You might also schedule out some time once a month to pay bills together as a couple and review your finances.

Schedule Your New Routines And Take Them For A Test Drive.

Write out your new routines and schedule them into your planner and/or stick them somewhere you’ll see them. You have to follow through now and test drive them for 30 days.

Make a note of how you feel, (use your journal). Does it all make sense? Does anything need to shift? Have you been realistic? One clear way to decide that is if it feels effortless. If you are too rushed things need to change around. Do you need help with anything (chores etc.,)? Are you taking on other responsibilities still? Be honest with yourself only you can change you!

Okay so your new routines might not fit your ideal at this stage but that’s okay as long it works for you. Remember you don’t have to do someone else’s routine either. The point of these routines is to set you up for a productive day so you can achieve the life you want. You can also use these routines as a means of creating a regular self-care habit.

Work With Me.

Remember you are allowed to ask for support. No one is an island. If you need extra support then you can also work with me. We all struggle with stress and overwhelm from time to time. If you find this has become a problem for you and you’d like some support then schedule an appointment with me.