We all need to have healthy boundaries in place. These 5 are some of the common types we need. Read through the common boundary types and ask yourself: Which of these are you better at putting place? Are you better at putting place boundaries at work or at home? Are there specific people, events or things that trigger you to drop your healthy boundaries? Try to identify which common boundary types are an issue for you and what triggers there are around that boundary type.

1) Emotional or Psychological Boundaries

Are you feeling you “have to” take care of other’s feelings? Do you feel invalidated or criticized? Do you over-share personal information without getting to know the person first? Then you may have an issue with this type of boundary.

We all have the right to our own feelings and thoughts. To feel we can express our thoughts and ideas without being dismissed, invalidated or criticized. We also have the right to differentiate between what we feel and think and others’ feelings and thoughts. These are reinforced by our emotional or psychological boundaries.

We also need to recognize that we own our own feelings and thoughts and as such are also responsible for them. We are not responsible for how others feel or think. That is on them and we should respect this also. It is our own healthy boundaries that allow us to hold ourselves accountable for our own emotional and psychological wellbeing.

2) Physical Boundaries

Are you feeling uncomfortable around someone? Do you feel someone is invading your personal space? Do you not get enough sleep? Or not stick to your work hours? Do not take your lunch break? If you answer yes to these types of questions then you may have physical boundary issues.

Our physical boundaries are there to help protect our body and personal space. These can include: our right to privacy, how we define our personal space and what kind of physical touch you find acceptable. It can also include meeting our physical needs such as shelter, sleep and food.

3) Financial And Possession Boundaries

Are you loaning money to people who never pay you back? Are you over spending, living beyond your means? Do you allow family or friends to borrow items without returning them? Do you constantly work overtime without getting paid properly? If you answer yes to these types of questions then you may have problems with financial and possession boundaries.

Our financial and possession boundaries are there to protect our financial and material possessions. It means you have certain rights and entitlements around your money. We don’t have to hand it over to someone to control. You get to choose how you spend it or loan it to. We have the right to be paid for the work we do.

You also have responsibilities with money and possessions. To pay your bills and taxes and stay within your budget. To care for your home, car and other possessions appropriately. Plus having respect for other people’s financial and possession boundaries.

4) Time Boundaries

Are you someone who is always at the beck and call of others, no matter what? Do you find yourself over working a lot? Do you agree to do things for others even though they are capable of doing it themselves? Or do you allow others to waste your time? If you answer yes to questions like these you may have a time boundary issue.

Time is a precious commodity. We all get twenty four hours each day and when it’s gone, it’s gone. How we spend our time is set by our beliefs around our time boundaries. Time boundaries are there to protect how we spend our time.

Yes we do have obligations to work and family. We also have obligations to ourselves also. If you find yourself taking work home, working longer and longer hours you have to ask yourself why? If you find you are allowing others to waste your time or are doing things for others you don’t want to then again you have to ask yourself why?

5) Relationship And Sexual Boundaries

Do you find your partner, family or friends don’t respect you? Is your partner, family or friend lying to you or being dishonest with you? Is your right to consent being ignored when it comes to sex? Do you find you have trouble with intimacy? Do you have communication issues with a partner, family member, friend, manager or co-worker? If you answer yes to these types of questions then relationships, including the one with yourself, and sexual boundaries may be a problem for you.

All relationships should be based on mutual respect, trust and honesty. If these are not there then that relationship doesn’t work. Good relationships boundaries will include how we communicate, how issues are resolved, time alone and what we share about ourselves with others. If in an intimate relationship then sexual boundaries come into it also. These protect our rights around intimacy and sexual consent.

If you need help with putting in place healthy boundaries then reach out to a local therapist. If you’d like some self-help tips to get you started with setting boundaries than do check out my workbooks below.

My Books

I offer a variety of tips and discuss a range of topics in my workbooks The Building Blocks Of Self-Care, Moving Towards Self-forgiveness, The Little Book Of Reflection And Gratitude and Building Acceptance Into Your Life. You can purchase them on Amazon or here.