Building up over many years, even decades in some cases, we can accumulate a lot of “stuff”.  This can become overwhelming and restrictive to the point of suffocating. We can start to feel that if we don’t get rid of some of this “stuff” we will never be able to breathe fully again.

But it isn’t always an easy task as we have grown familiar and comfortable surrounded by this “stuff”. That familiarity can keep us trapped and feeling overwhelmed until we let go. Creating some space in our mental and physical lives will allow us to grow into a new life. One that is not so negative and overwhelming to occupy.

How Do We Go About Letting Go Of Things.

Perhaps I should start the process by describing what I mean by “stuff”. I don’t just mean physical things. I also include negative people and our own negative thinking in here also. These can keep us feeling very overwhelmed and trapped perhaps even more so than those physical items we have accumulated.

Letting go of anything can be very emotional and overwhelming. So as I always suggest start small. It is far better to tackle just one item, one thought or one person at a time. If we try to do it all at once we will become even more overwhelmed and stop altogether.

So removing that one item and recycling it. Or not taking that one phone call from your negative “friend”. Or challenging one thought just this once. These small steps are all better than going all gung ho and setting your self up for failure.

How Clutter Impacts Your Mental And Physical Health.

Research shows us that clutter can have a big impact on our mental and physical health. Some of the following reasons might give you the motivation to begin.

1. Clutter may impact your self-
2. Your anxiety and depression
3. Health and safety issues arise.
4. Clutter increases our stress levels also.
5. It’s a time killer.
6. Impacts your sleep.
7. It affects your relationships.

3 Key Areas Where You Can Learn To Let Go.

1 Tackling Physical Clutter.

It can be a struggle to start any kind of physical declutter. Our belongings can have such emotional attachments associated with them. Having some organizational pointers can help.

1. Start small! Only one item a day particularly if you are struggling to let things go.
2. Decide which room needs to be done first. I would start with your bedroom as this will help with your sleep. Or if your home is too overwhelming then start with your car or your office desk.
3. Make sure you have everything you need before you start. Such as a box or bag for smaller items you can recycle. I would place this in the boot of your car or garage if you have one so the item is gone from your space. Try to empty this box once a week. Make a list of other things you might need such as a shredder for old paperwork. Maybe a contact name and number for any larger furniture items you need removing, sold or recycled.
4. Set aside time in your planner to complete declutter and then set a timer on your phone for 5 minutes. What you get done in that 5 minutes is it. You’ll do another 5 minutes tomorrow. In that way you will get the job completed and not feel completely overwhelmed by it all.
5. Review your space while you declutter. What would help to keep the room tidy? Perhaps you need some storage and bin solutions. So make sure to put these in place so the clutter doesn’t build again.
6. Enroll the support of a positive friend. Having someone to support you while going through this process can be very helpful. They can be a good sounding board. They can make some suggestions regarding items you can get rid of. If you want to keep the item then you can argue a valid reason to keep it.

2 Decluttering Our Thoughts

Decluttering our home is an important support for our mental and physical health. But equally important is decluttering our thoughts. These are often overlooked, especially the unconscious beliefs.  But if we tackle them it can and does help improve our mental and physical health much quicker than just a physical declutter alone.

Remember to keep things simple here and start to build your awareness. Try to identify one negative thought at a time or the type of negative thinker you are. Using a journal can help you to identify your thought patterns. You can read back over what you have written and highlight any thoughts that fit into particular patterns. Which one of the following would your thought patterns fit into?

1. The worrier: The worst case is always going to happen. “What if?” “What if people don’t like me?” “What if I make a fool of myself?” This leads to anxiety. You need to tackle this type of negative self-talk if you want to reduce your anxiety.
2. The critic: Always putting yourself down. “I’m so stupid.” “I’m no good.” “I’m a bad person.” “I’m useless.” This leads to low self-esteem. You won’t build up your self-confidence or esteem if you keep thinking along these lines.
3. The perfectionist: You can’t make mistakes, everything has to be better and better all the time. “I should…all the time.” “I must… all the time.” “I have to…” This leads to chronic stress. Again when dealing with stress we have to watch how we speak to our self.
4. The victim: You believe everything in your life is beyond your control. “I can’t change anything in my life.” “I’m never going to get better.” “I’ll never be able to do that” “It’s all because of …past/my illness/my family/my boss/my boyfriend.” This leads to depression. Part of treatment for depression is to look at how we self-talk.

Once you have identified a thought pattern then see how this might affect your behaviour, your emotions and physical responses. You can also start to challenge them and rewrite that automatic tape in your head. Plus add in some gratitude. If you would like a more detailed step by step guide to deleting your negative thoughts and beliefs click on the links.

3 Deleting Negative People.

Don’t tell me you don’t know who these people are. They are the one that seem to never have anything good to say. They talk about their problems or gossip about others in a negative way. People like these are ones you know you could never count on. They make you feel like the life and soul have been drained out of you and the room. It’s time to reevaluate how you interact with them and delete where you can.

Remember to start small and only tackle one person at a time. Sometimes it can be easier to start with those who are furthest away in our circle of trust. A journal can help here also as you can write down the answers to the questions I’ve included here. But remember to keep it secure and away from prying eyes.

1. Assess the people in your life. Make a list. Take some time over this. Think about all the people who enter your life every day or week. That means everyone including family, friends, work colleagues, neighbours or anyone you have to interact with on a regular basis. Ask yourself some questions about the people in your life.  Are they soul enhancers or are they negative vampires? You will want to to encourage those people who positively support
2. Start minimizing contact with those who don’t support you in a positive manner. Sometimes for practical reasons we cannot stop seeing someone but we can minimize contact with them. It can be difficult to do but until you do they will continue to drag you down and you’re not going to feel good about yourself.
3. Delete where you can. Cutting out people from your life can be difficult I know. But it’s for your own sanity! Start by stop taking all their phone calls every day or meeting up with them. This may be easier with family than work. So you must have your excuses ready.
4. Make sure you fill your time with your positive support system. In that way you simply won’t have time to meet with or deal with negative people.

Work With Me.

Remember you are allowed to ask for support. If you need extra support then you can also schedule an appointment with me.