What Is A Core Belief?
A belief is an idea that you hold as being true and may be based upon certainties, probabilities or matters of faith. Beliefs can come from a variety of sources such as:
- Your own experiences or experiments (e.g. childhood, school, family, friends, neighbourhood, etc.)
- Your cultural and societal norms you accept (e.g. religion, country’s laws or accepted norms, etc.)
- What other people say (g. education or mentoring, peers, etc.)
When we first receive a potential belief it will remain in our minds until we accept it, or reject it. If we accept it then it is added to our individual belief system. Most of our core beliefs come from our childhood experiences unless we have taken time to question them.
Once accepted we will defend this belief, even to the point of sabotaging ourselves on a subconscious level. We will do this until we start to question the core belief again. But these beliefs are not set in stone and they can be changed. We also need to remember that our beliefs will also feed our personal values. But what are personal values?
What Are Personal Values?
Values are important stable long-lasting beliefs about what is important to you. They are general standards by which you order your life and make choices. Beliefs can be categorized into different value areas in your life. These value areas include your: family, career, success, happiness, wealth, etc.
You will use these values to make clear, rational, responsible and consistent decisions about each area of your life. These feed your attitudes and ultimately your behaviour. Examples of values could include: Loyalty, Humility, Compassion, Honesty, Kindness, etc.
Just like core beliefs not everyone will have the same values as you in life. Even among siblings there can be a difference in core belief and values. It will all depend upon what you have accepted as true for you.
Our Core Beliefs Dictate Our Reality.
As you can see your core beliefs and values impact our behaviours. Will we do something or won’t we? Do we deserve something in our life or don’t we? If we don’t believe deep down inside that we can make changes or deserve something then it won’t happen. For the simple reason we will self-sabotage it time and time again.
Those core beliefs, if negatively inclined, can keep us trapped and doing things that are not in our best interest. All because we believe we need to keep doing whatever it is we are doing. The people pleasing, perfectionism, procrastination, all or nothing thinking or any other cognitive led by a core belief. distortion will be
Our thinking, emotions, reactions, are all connected to that inner world of core beliefs. And whatever is happening inside will also dictate our outside world as well. Our relationships, goals, desires, etc., will all connect back to those core beliefs we hold about ourselves and our world. But these core beliefs can be changed.
How Do We Recognize Our Core Beliefs. 
In order to change our core beliefs we must first recognise that we have them. Which core beliefs are working for us and which ones need to be changed? This takes some time and patience with ourselves. We need to stand back and really start to pay attention to what is going on in our lives. Pay attention to our thoughts, feelings, physical symptoms and behaviours.
A good way to do this is to examine the different areas of our life. Plus we need to look at the people we have in each area of our life. The support system we have in place around us. We need to start to question things. How we do things? Why do we react to a situation the way we do? Why we always seem to people please (perfectionism, procrastinate, etc.)? Why we do things in a certain way? Why do we interact with this person? These are some of the questions we can begin with.
It can be a hard road to question every aspect of our lives. Even if we only take one area, or our interactions with one person or situation, at a time, it can still be hard going. That is one reason why we don’t do it and another reason why I suggest you have support while doing it.
You are trying to change your fundamental beliefs about yourself and your world here. It shouldn’t be taken lightly. A therapist can put a different perspective on things that we might not be able to see.
Remember You Can Change Your Core Beliefs.
There are a number of self-help things you can do to help change your core beliefs. These will include meditation to help you become more aware of yourself. Journaling is also helpful as you can use it to reflect on your day or events playing on your mind. It also allows you to track any patterns in thinking, feeling, behaviours, etc. Recognizing your problematic core beliefs is a first step to changing them.
A review of your boundaries also helps. As though with problematic core beliefs also tend to have skewed boundaries. I’ve outlined a step by step process to all these before and included a lot more information in my book and workbook that you might find helpful.
Work With Me.
Remember you are allowed to ask for support. No one is an island. If you need extra support then you can also work with me. We all struggle with stress and overwhelm from time to time. If you find this has become a problem for you and you’d like some support then schedule an appointment with me.
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